Pursuing Happiness is kind of a Big Deal...

 All I truly want in life, is to wake up one morning and say honestly “ I want nothing more”.   One of my favorite movies is ‘Meet Joe Black’, and in this film the character William Parrish speaks of his life at his birthday party, and last day on earth:

    “I thought I was going to sneak away tonight. What a glorious night. Every face I see is a memory. It may not be a perfectly perfect memory. Sometimes we had our ups and downs. But we're all together, and you're mine for a night. And I'm going to break precedent and tell you my one candle wish: that you would have a life as lucky as mine, where you can wake up one morning and say, "I don't want anything more." Sixty-five years. Don't they go by in a blink??”[1]

Imagine for a moment if that could be you.  This is the statement of someone truly happy, content, pleased with the way they lived their life.  I understand it is a film, and William Parrish is fictional; but it does not stop me from believing that that type of contentment is possible.  This is what I want in my life.
  
    There are moments in life that bring fillings of complete satisfaction.  Some moments you know that there is nowhere else you would rather be.  The feeling of the presence brings so much joy, peace, comfort, and fulfillment.   These experiences bring a sense that time has stopped for the moment (for your moment).  In these moments the world around you disappears, and nothing feels better.  I am searching for that deep sense of inner peace, gratitude, and in a sense love.
  
    Happiness is really much more than feeling good. We each innately know this.  In our darkest of times someone usually tries to console by saying words of encouragement and comfort.   Some common phrases are “Keep moving forward”, “that is what life”.   That is what we tell ourselves, even when things do not go as planned.  We know that bad things have happened, and will continue to happen; but we tell one another to keep moving forward.   If you were to ask why, the response is usually a statement that says ‘that’s life”.   So, what do we do in these difficult times?  Well, the world does not stop, the bills continue to roll in.  Even if it feels like your world has completely imploded, the sun sets and rises.   What comes next is the every day things.  We pay the bills and we don’t stop living.  Even if you think you know what will happen, it doesn’t always.  This is called hope.  We hope for better days and for something more. 

    There is nothing more miserable than when life inches along.  Time ticks by, and no longer are you counting hours; and at this point, you hope to one day reach the point where you can count hours.  Now you are counting seconds until another day passes.  I have been at that point in my life, a time when my world felt like it ended; and only came to realize that did not end.  In some ways that was more difficult and I had to someway keep moving forward.   I decided that I was not going to let this thing beat me, and that I would find happiness, whatever that meant for me.   There are times when positive emotions flood through the body; and times when you want time to slow.  All I knew was that I wanted life to feel like it was moving too fast, because when you count the seconds in a day, or how many breathes you’ve taken in an hour, it isn’t enough.  How can a man with no limbs, like Nick Vujicic, be so happy and I so unhappy?

    Life is beautiful, and in darker moments it is very difficult to see.  I want to find ways to concur those moments.  To find quick ways out of the deep dark hole and find my way into contentment and joy.  Happiness is a big deal to most of us, and I know I am not alone in my pursuit.  If I was, they would not have included the right into the United States Constitution.   Yes, I believe it is important to every one of us.   How nice would it be to go to one spot to see many different techniques and steps to find happiness.   The thing about happiness is that it can be temporary.  Bad things happen or mood spoilers, but true happiness is what I am searching for.  True happiness is more stable, and one bad thing, or a few, won’t shake it.  That is what I am looking for, and if you are truly honest with yourself.  I believe you are too.


References:
1.   'Meet Joe Black'  (1998).

Introduction

    Once upon a time you were born; and as your life began, so did your personal pursuit for happiness.  Even as children, we pursued things that aided in us feeling good.  Over time, the things that made us feel good changed.   We set goals in hopes of attaining something more as we strive for success; and part of that motivation is the hope of ultimately conjuring another feeling of some type of satisfaction.  At some point we need more than passing feel good moments.   With that realization we begin to search more for a feeling that is not so fleeting, but rather more a constant feeling of contentment or joy.  It almost seems as though it is part of human nature to naturally pursue that which makes us feel good.  It is even hard to accept that the things that make us feel good immediately do not always bring us happiness.
    Each day we search for a mental state of delight, satisfaction, contentment, joy, bliss, good fortune, pleasure and peace.[1][3]  Daily we pursue happiness, and our U.S. Constitution gives us the right to do so.  I will admit to wanting my own life story to include that I lived happily ever after, and I have a sneaking suspicion that I am not alone in this want.  I use the phrase 'happily ever after', because it is something many of us grew up hearing from books and movies.  Living happily ever after is so appealing to me because the thought implies that happiness comes easily for the rest of that person’s days.  Is it possible that knowing what happiness is, and different methods of how to feel it, will help it be felt effortlessly?  Benjamin Franklin said “The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.”

    What is true happiness?  If happiness is a subjective state of well-being, then does it really mean that everyone has their own notion of what it includes? [4]   Whatever it is, and wherever it comes from, it must feel fantastic; and exploring what that means individually can be very fun.  We know that it is more than something that is just fun or just feels good.  Over the past few years I have pondered seriously over what it means to be happy.  After many night long debates with friends, family and strangers, I concluded that most of us are in search of it, but few of us understand what it is.  Many of us think that when we feel it, we can recognize it.   Happiness, with all its biological underpinnings, its many layers, and intensities, clearly is more complex than simply feeling good. [3][4]

    This is such a universally human search that there is more information on it than one person could handle.  If there is so much research, why is it so difficult for so many to explain? Why is it that sometimes it is so difficult to feel?   Happiness can be defined as emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy, that are experienced when in a mental state of well being; but this is only one definition. [2]  There have been many different fields of research on this topic: biology, psychology, philosophy, religion, happiness economics, as well as other studies that have attempted to identify and define what it really is. [3]   It is clear that it is more than a feeling.  Will Wilkinson, of the CATO Institute, says “We don’t necessarily value episodes with more total pleasure over episodes with less”. [4]   Happiness is much deeper than the superficial moments of feeling pleasure.  Some of the greatest minds have dived into this topic.   Harvard psychologist Dan Gilbert says that what a persons think will bring him or her happiness is frequently wrong; and our psychological immune system can cause happy feelings, even when things go wrong in life.[5]

   [5]

    My purpose in this blog is to attempt to research and explore what true happiness is, and report back.  Is it really attainable for everyone?  Can any person become truly happy?  I will attempt to summarize different takes on happiness, and some will include the above mentioned fields of research.  I will research philosophers, psychologists, motivational speakers, experts in the fields, just to name a few.  I will attempt to tackle one type of approach at a time, in order to help fully understand the concept.  My hope is that with a better understanding of what it is and different methods of reaching the state of happiness, that we can all be happier on a daily basis.  In this project I hope to compile enough information to help myself and others form and strengthen beliefs on what happiness is.  This is how I hope to create a brief and inspiring source to help individuals, who are also in the pursuit of happiness, create their own personal happily ever after.  Cheesy pursuit?... Maybe.... but admit it, you want it too.

References:

       1.  “Happiness”, dictionary.com, 2011, http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/happiness. (23 May 2011).

       2.  Ferguson, Will, “Happiness”, 2001, http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=happiness&a=*C.happiness-_*Word- (24 May 2011).
 
       3. “Happiness”, wikipedia.org, 24 May 2011, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happiness  (22 May 2011).
 
       4.  Wilkinson, Will. “In Pursuit of Happiness Research: Is it Reliable? What does it Imply for Policy?” In Policy Analysis. no. 590 (2007). CATO Institute (23 May 2011).

       5.  Gilbert, Dan, “Dan Gilbert asks, Why are We Happy?”, ted.com, Feb 2004, http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html (23 May 2011)